Why you should be screened
Every day I see a post on Sex Work Twitter (the part of Twitter that is all escort profiles interacting with each other) about a companion who was robbed, raped, or worse. Inevitably, the topic of client safety always comes up.
I can't tell you how many times a gentleman will ask for an appointment with me, only to have an over exaggerated 'freak-out' when I ask for his screening details. I've heard comments from men that range from "screw this, I'm trying to get laid not apply for a job," all the way to "die bitch." In the best case scenario, a client who doesn't want to screen will simply not reply. I have even had some men give me one reference, unable to provide a second one, and get angry when I turn the appointment down. I feel like today is a good day to explain why this is so necessary, and provide examples of why I do what I do.
Let me first say this; I completely understand why many men are hesitant to give this information, I really do. I completely understand the need for discretion and not wanting to give someone you don't know access to your personal information. We ladies have fears and worries, and we constantly wonder why a man would put his penis in a stranger, but not his trust? Seems like the most precious male body part to put at risk considering the circumstances.
For more anonymity, the best route is to use references. In order to gain a reference though, you must usually give out your information to someone. It's best to do your research, find a trustworthy provider, and give your screening info to them so that you can use that person as a reference to see other escorts in the future. Many escorts only require one reference, but I require two and with good reason.
If you have ever read my TER reviews, you would see that the one thing they all have in common (aside form all being really great) is that men always mention my screening process as being difficult or strict. I have been on many sites of competing providers and have actually taken my screening process from about four other girls. I know I am not the only one with this process, and it is becoming the industry standard. I know there are other high end escorts doing this, so I am always surprised when a man says my process is more strict than most girls. The only explanation I can think of is that said male is used escorts who might be in vulnerable positions, where they have to risk their safety in order to make living. For example, a survival sex worker (someone who trades sex for resources or for money that goes straight to resources like food, water, shelter) might be willing to take the risk of being murdered if it means she can feed her hungry child. She might forgo screening in order to lessen the barriers for clients to book with her in order to make ends meet.
One time I saw a client who is known on many sites as ddave1939. He gave me two references and his p411 account (P411 is an invite-only website that lists providers) so I could check his Okays from other girls. I wrote to two of the women asking for reference information and they never responded.
There are a couple of questions I MUST have the answer to from references. Most girls will write "he is safe" and send no further details. Simply being 'safe' is not enough for me. Most guys pass these checks, but some do not. One reference might say he was dirty/smelly, and another might say he was fine. If both say the same thing then I get a true idea of what I am in for if I agree to an appointment.
So back to the gentleman before of which I was speaking, 'Dave'. I never heard from the girls personally but I assumed since he had several Okays on p411, that he must be okay to see, so I let him book. The first appointment with him was awesome, but when he came to his second appointment penetrated me without a condom, without my permission. He asked me to Okay him on p411 and I said no, and told p411 about the situation. A couple months later he was angry about this still, and posted negatively about me on a site where I am well known; telling people I was mentally unstable and that he had seen me several times (instead of only 2) and that my craziness is why he no longer visited.
I had to inform p411 of him taking retribution on me publicly, and they revoked his account. It also destroyed any future credibility with women on other websites because he had to be blacklisted, so he is pretty much stuck to streetwalkers and women that don't know better because they dont screen. That being said, I let myself down by not rejecting him when I never heard back from his references. Many girls don't reply to other escorts, so thats why I require two references; in case one doesn't reply. There are many escorts who have questionable safety practices regarding condoms, or have drug problems, who I will absolutely not accept as a reference... and they get used as references with me all the time. If a man has seen many providers (more than 3) and still can't cough up two references, I get the feeling it may be because he did something that would warrant those providers not to have anything nice to say, and I reject the appointment.
When it comes to personal employment and verification, things get a lot tougher. Again, totally understand why someone would never want to give that info, but then that person is just not for me (or most of the companions in the industry, even).
The more info you have about you online, the less personal information I will need. How can I believe he actually works somewhere and is not a cop instead, faking references? I can't.
Guys try to send me a LinkedIn all the time, but linkedin alone is never enough. They are so easy to fake! I know because mine is super; so that family thinks I do something else for a living.
Think cops wont go through the trouble of faking credentials to bust someone? Think again. There are tons of forums by cops, for cops, all about how to best pull off busting girls (and guys). I have had run-ins with police twice which both resulted unsuccessfully for them, but ever since the second time I beefed up my screening requirements and have never had a problem since.
When you send your full screening information over, a companion will usually verify that you are not law enforcement, and she will pay to run a criminal check on your for violent crimes. On site separate occasions I had someone send me their ID and I found out that they either had assault and battery charges, or were a sex offender. If I didn't screen then I would have risked meeting them, and would have jeopardized every client I met after them.
The main things clients are worried about when it comes to screening is blackmail, but what we companions are worried about is our physical safety. I can promise you that if you do your research and book a legitimate escort, you will never have an issue with your personal information. And you have given your personal info out for so much less, why not consider giving it to someone so they can feel safe with you?
If you do decide to go the route of full screening, dont be tempted to send over fake info. We will find out when we run the background check and we have other methods of information to find out if someone is real or not.
When booking an escort (which is illegal in the US) one must accept some level of risk and it is up to each of us to research risks and determine for our selves how much risk each is willing to accept. I am not willing to accept much risk. You make yourself seem like you are up to no good when you want total anonymity, and whether that is true or not (because hey, it probably isn't true) it's not a risk I am willing to take, and I am not willing to risk the safety of past clients by seeing someone who could be out to harm me in one way or another. Put yourself in the shoes of the companion and ask yourself, would you meet a strange male when you're all alone? Keep in mind, if she takes her safety seriously, she also takes YOUR safety seriously. You are much less likely to have any issues in your personal life when your companion is careful with her screening - it means she is careful in all aspects of life.
